A reflection of failing

I did not complete my goal of running every day. I have failed. Its a statement I’ve used easily and often.

But I have a few observations on myself. I hope this helps someone else.

I have always tried to admit my mistakes. Not saying I’ve skirted responsibility, I have, and on a fair number of those failures gotten away without anyone noticing. Except, of course, myself.

The reasons why I fail –

I find it easy, almost cathartic, to blame myself. You are a bad person who has done many bad things. You are human or worse. You cannot succeed, you should not. This excuse has been my ace in the hole. It gives me comfort for when things get too hard and I feel like I can no longer try.

I lack follow thru. Hence this blog. Evidently I need to start smaller.

My small steps for this week are going to sound foolish but they are, to me, vital. For the next week I will finish the dishes, all of them every time I start. For the next week I will fold all of the laundry.

A house, no matter how beautiful, will crumble without the proper foundation so this is my new foundation. A way to rebuild my house from the ground up.

I hope it works

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