Life Project #1 is going well thus far. Running is as frustrating as it is exhilarating. Happily the nerd-friend has watched the baby so there have been mommy time runs. This has given me time to stop and think. Running for whatever reason really does unclog whatever neurological blocks I’ve set up for myself. I’m sure this is utterly revolutionary thinking and I’m the only one who has ever experienced this.
Sarcasm aside one of the things I’ve dwelt on is my relationship. I am one of the few humans alive to be lucky enough to have met my soul mate. That may sound naive and maybe it is. I’ve had relationships before, good and bad, but my nerd friend is different. I could expound on how the sun rises only when he opens his eyes and says “good morning beautiful”. I could relate how ever since the moment I met him I’ve wanted to be that better person that I feel like I am when he is in my arms. It is what it is and I feel that every minute with him I’m left better than the one that came before.
This rancher and I first locked messages and not eyes. His first sentence to me was that he thought he loved me and I was shocked and wanted to be off put by this dude’s utter surety. I was charmed and in spite of myself wanted to know more. We messaged each other for over a month trying to meet but life kept getting in the way.
I would write down the full story of all the weird stuff that has happened to us since that first message where a strange boy told me he loved me before even seeing me but it is painful and it is hard to believe. Even for me the time we’ve had together has felt like a dream.
But the thing that surprised me the most was that this wasn’t Gone with the Wind. After we fell in love and halved our hearts in effort to make each other whole there was no curtain call and my happy ending is still going on. In some ways this is great and in some ways it’s a bit of a what the hell.
If you can’t tell by this blog I work toward goals. I enjoy having direction, conquering challenges and being super mom, super nerd and super girlfriend.
What is the goal here? To maintain? Maintenance is something you do to a broken thing and we are the polar opposite of broken, life is amazing! So what do I do to make it better? What is there to patch when there are no leaks?
I am a rainy day person. I enjoy the sunlight but look for the storm clouds.
My head goes on repeat – How do I have a boyfriend this amazing and intelligent who wants to spend the rest of his life with me?
So that’s the life project. To turn that little voice in the back of my head to minimal volume and to, every time that voice pipes up to says you aren’t worthy, to look at my best friend, boyfriend and love of my life and tell him that I love him endlessly and always will.
No goal, no countdown. Just thank you universe for letting me meet the love of my life.
No Goal, No Set, Happy Sunday!!